If this were part of the Twilight Zone, I might file it under "careful what you wish for," but it's tough for me to have that much ironic detachment. Last Sunday, I slipped over a short railing that encloses my porch and fell about eight feet, head first, onto the cement below.
The emergency room doctors told me there was bleeding in my brain, contusions that could potentially lead to serious problems. They debated until the next morning whether or not to operate, forbidding me either to eat or drink until they'd made up their minds. I became increasingly desperate for any kind of food, while the hospital staff treated me like a cartoon character who'd just had an anvil or a piano dropped on my head. When I finally managed to sleep, nurses woke me every hour to make sure I still knew who I was, where I was and what had happened. With my correct responses, it was decided that surgery would not be required.
After two days in the hospital, I had consistently enough proven my self-awareness that I was released. "Look out for these signs of brain damage," the doctors warned me, and I agreed to keep my eyes open.
On my own recognizance, I found myself in a kind of Cartesian limbo, awareness betrayed by the nervous system it comprised. With its various injuries and robbed of its constant IV drip, my body wouldn't respond the way I expected. I was trapped in a broken shell of meat.
Having had more time to "get my head together" and treat my wounds, I decided to go for a walk this afternoon. The bloody scabs on my face made me self-conscious, but it only got worse when I realized I could barely walk. Ankle scabs and atrophy conspired to make me stagger down the street. My shoulder, which absorbed its share of the impact, hasn't completely healed either. This morning, I noticed that the whole area, along with all those IV holes, was turning yellow.
Am I already starting to decompose? Have I been writing about zombies for too long? Zombies trying to live their lives would go through this every day. This isn't just a story anymore, and I'm hungry.
